365 days of wearing a name tag.

365 days of being Sister Mcgrath. I hit my one year mark this week but am more confused than anything. What? How did this happen? It was so weird I went back in my journal and read the entry from that day exactly one year ago, when I got set apart and when I lost my ID and when I found it, when I woke up on the 23 and practically ran through security to shove down the pain of goodbyes, my first MTC day, all of that seems so much like it happened yesterday and also sooo long ago. I sound like such a little kid in my journal its almost embarrassing haha :) "I'm still learning how to follow the Spirit" HA SIS MCG ITS YOUR FIRST DAY! I can honestly say I'm one year older and wiser too. It is crazy how much I've slowly become a different person when I wasn't even watching, looking back though makes it blaringly obvious. So yep, this week I've just been going through some basic amnesia patient questions like who am I, where am I, how did I get here, etc.

On a less existential note, last pday we ran and then played volleyball and basketball. who knew- I'm waaaay competitive. I should have (but didn't) sat out to cool down because it was getting way intense. I may or may not have slammed into Sis K and trash talked her. I wrote her an apology note though :) It was so much fun and we were probably sweating more from laughing so hard than from anything else. haha fun fun fun

We taught Tatay B this week and it is so hard to control the lesson he is all over the place with the topic. We were trying to talk about the temple and I asked him what the temple is for/why we have temples and his first response is so that when the devil falls from the sky all the spikey spear like things on the manila temple will stab him through. deeeeep breattthhh.  Good idea, but no. i wish i could just record all of the crazy things people say sometimes so I can laugh about it later.

An elder in our district had a bday and we suprised him after work in the office with a cake. things got a little crazy and some elders slapped frosting on my face which lead to a cake war....everyone's faces were frosted :) don't worry we cleaned it up. it was very sweet :)))))))))))) puuuuunnnyyyyy!!

We had a community service project ripping out weeds and other nature with our hands. Man, I am just so grateful we had a garden and I'm not a complete dunce when it comes to hard work. I am so grateful my first time touching dirt is not on my mission WHEW!  Nevertheless I gave a bit of a plant pulling 101 class to those who were less fortunate than I and didn't have parents to teach em how to till the ground. It was great cause then this little puppy came running around and I just grabbed it and held it like a baby and watched my students weed like pros. haha its all about delegation ;) just kidding i worked hard too promise :)

We were looking for some soul to teach this week and came across a bday celebration. Sis j kept walking but I stopped and said "no this is the perfect opportunity!" and we interrupted, introduced ourselves, and within 3 mins had a plate of cake and were one of the family.  People are very very nice, not a lot of them progress or ever will come to church, but they will feed you their own bday cake upon first meeting. deep sigh.

Update on that poor lady- we went to her a couple times this week but she was busy doing things, stirring the trash she collected of rotten food in a big pot for her pigs and stuff like that. I grabbed some juice pouches and crackers from our house and quietly gave it to her, even though we couldn't teach her we can still be nice. She broke out in the biggest smile and her whole countenance changed. It made me sad of course that we might drop her as our investigator, but she's still my sister. I don't blame her for not giving 2 well dressed rich girls who probably don't understand what she's going through the time of day when she's got mouths to feed. But like Elder Holland says, I may not be my brother's keeper but I am my brothers brother. It's true, I've got no idea what its like to be that desperate, but that doesn't mean I cant hug and cry and support her through.

This week we were finally able to teach L again, the less active we found forever ago who yelled "mormons?" at us. its been 9 weeks since our last time we shared to her, work and timing and shes going between 2 houses so its nearly impossible. we sat with her and she got emotional and told us that ever since our last visit out words have been running through her mind about repentance and the gift of the atonement. She has depression and can't sleep and says that her sins are literally eating her away. As she talked and talked to us, I felt like I was looking down at her in a deep, deep hole. She says she can never forgive herself for what she's done and says that she can't get out alone. My testimony of the atonement burned within me and through tears I promised her that the atonement of Jesus Christ covers everything, no matter how tall, wide, or deep. We talked about the title of Jesus Christ as Savior meaning literally that, her Savior. she looked at us and questioned "really?" as if she wanted it to be true so bad. We were throwing down a rope in that deep deep hole and begging her to grab on and we would help her out the best we can. The atonement really is light, and it dispels the darkest of fears and discouragement. I cant describe the love I had for her as we were in that lesson, it was radiating out of my heart! It really is so true, no matter how rich you are, how many things or jobs you have, how smart or talented you are, like her, if there isn't Jesus Christ it is all nothing. She told us that her life truly is hollow because she's turned away from the church. It was a very intense lesson and the love and desperation of helping her was so strong. I could write 10 more years about her and all the deep thoughts I've had this week about the atonement and the saving power of Jesus Christ, but times a ticking.

This week we've dropped even more investigators who aren't really progressing. Sometimes I wonder if anyone I've ever taught or meet will ever not end up in the dropped pile. Even our ward mission leader asked why are there so many dropped and what's the problem. Ouch. But I'm keeping the little flame of my hope alive and trying to block it from the wind! I know I am doing my best, I know I am being obedient, I know that I am going above and beyond and that there is no effort wasted. its ok that I can't see any fruits or results, its ok. It's not about me, none of this work is about me. I had a little cry this week, hugged it out, ate some sugar, and everything is fine. Missions are hard.

In the midst of the hardness, rain, this rough hard hearted area, there still is so much that's beautiful. So much I'm grateful for and so much joy I'm finding in the journey, not the destination. We've been keeping our spirits up with lots of rounds of Speed with the kabahays, music, and cookie dough. I'm pretty sure in every stage of life not just missions, there are hard times, so what better time than now to find silver linings?

Life is good, missions are hard, missions are the best, I love it, what more can I say. I love you all family you are the best thing i have! miss you and love you so much!!

<3 sis mcgrath

All I do is give people band aids

hellooooo!!!! its been another week but it feels like just yesterday I was emailing. but yup, when I go and look at my journal somehow there's another 7 days of stuff written in there. Ill try and summarize it the best i can :)

he he..... this one didn't load last week. this is my passage 

from teenagerhood to adulthood. :) its a tight squeeze man!

On monday we got tutored in the art of cooking tinolang bicol!! Brother abonalla cooked for us and it was so so so so masarap.  He was just doing his thing cooking, then I come up behind him with my planner out and start taking notes.  I swear i have so many scratches of paper that i write messy recipes on from observing people cook! Brother is kind of a toughie on the outside but nothing melts someones heart by showing interest in their culture's food.  Seriously.  I think i have made more friends by expressing my sincere joy by eating their food or trying something new and complimenting it like crazy than anything else.  So yes, Monday was bicolano tinola 101 day, I'm an expert now :)

On Tuesday we had a csp in the office elders area in Dalipay. We dug and gardened and plowed the ground behind this elementary school. lots of fun and a pain in the back! (really our backs were so sore from thrusting in our sickles with all our might the next day) ya, refer to picture now please :)

the next day we got a text from the zone leaders and they said that they had something for us. what? we went outside and they delivered a fresh tub of mango float!! for my birthday daw!! they actually cooked up some mango float for little old me as a late bday present. the never ending bday! we thanked them a ton and went inside and ate it all. yum.

our chicken!

Good news- we've got a chicken!! he adopted us! he made his little bed in the top of an old electric fan cover and lays eggs :D:D:D:D:D its the best!! except we returned him cause that's someone's food...but it was fun for a couple days.

we taught a poor, poor lady this week. oh her situation is so sad :( she has 3 little boys and her husband died from drinking himself to death, and her livelihood is digging through the trash mountain and also raising pigs. We sat with her and she just told us for so long of all the things she's been through and all the pain and trials she's seen :( her little boys sometimes wake up in the night and cry for their dad and she just tells them to look at his picture on the wall. Her son's wildest dream and wish is to eat fried chicken :( so many little things like that that she said that made me want to just hug her.  That was our withdraw day and in my bag I had my weekly money on my lap, just a feet away from a lady who digs through trash to find 5 pesos worth of something. Before that would have really messed with my mind, but its interesting now. Instead of wanting to just throw money at her and give her everything I have thats on me, I don't think like that anymore. Before we would teach and say the gospel will help you, and tell them that the gospel will help your life more than anything else, but I couldn't really 100% believe that when their naked bottom kids are running around them and there is no rice for tomorrow cause their husband spent all their money on alcohol...its hard to say that when the immediate needs like food and sanitation and money are blaring in your face. But now, its so different. even though thats this lady's situation, and of course money would help, I really have faith and a testimony that that is true--there is nothing else in this world that will help you more than following your Savior Jesus Christ. I cannot offer them money, can't offer them a job, but I can offer them the cure to all ills. I felt prompted to read a verse in 3 Nephi and when we did there was such a calm that entered into her tiny home. we testified that God knows her, that He hears her crying prayers and that He will take care of her like the sparrows or the lilies if she   is not of little faith. I felt like we reached out and stuck a band aid on her worried little heart. stick! Sometimes that's all I feel like I do, just give out band aids. I can't save you, I can't give you all the money you need, i don't know the first step to solve the cruel curses of poverty, but i've got band aids. lots and lots of them. Lots of scriptures, lots of testimony, lots of words to say to you that can help you come to know the Savior of the world. It's not me, nope. I've got no idea how to save the world. but I do know who does!

Dinner with senior couple

On a much nastier note our toilet got wayyy clogged this week. ya, it was rough and i didn't know if we were going to survive. haha we texted the elders 6:45 am HELP our cr is clogged help help help help!!! After some maneuvers I tamed the beast though, no need to worry! Plumber mcgrath is on the job! but really, I think I've got natural talent in that field.  Remember Brae when we fixed the toilet in our apt and had to figure out how to put the pin in the connecty thing and get the thing flushing? piece of cake! I don't know, just saying, back up back up back up plan if I fail all my other dreams, plumbing.

This week was SO awesome guess why! It's because we went jogging at 5:45 in the MORNING and drank buko juice right out of the freshly hacked buko!! its weird how I, sister mcgrath, would admit that running is fun. but seriously- i feel like i've been cooped up for so long just sitting at my desk and then walking then sitting and walking, that it felt like magic to just ruuuuuuuuun and book it as fast as i can! whoow!!! except actually, sis j is not a runner, as in, not at all. so its kinda funny, she walks and me and sis S take turns trotting beside her and sprinting back and forth between her and sis K wayyy up ahead. we ran also this morning and got some fresh buko and then played volleyball at the church. It hurts in my body but it's a good hurt!

Haha oook heres another funny story. we were teaching our very first FAMILY in such a long time for the second time this week, and we were talking plan of salvation, things were going good, we're still trying to break the ice a bit with the husband cause he's a bit of a tough cookie but i know he's just got a marshmallow filling, i just have to crack him open.  So we're always doing lots of get to know you/brt/we're normal people we want to be yo friennnddd kind of stuff, and were teaching l2:1, when all of a sudden ATTACK OF GODZILLA!! this freaky little black lizard jumped on my ankle and did the classic suction cup move...i flipped out and screamed and threw my foot kicking in the air until he came off. everyone was stunned, then they all cracked up laughing. haha it was so hard to return to the topic. Then you'll never believe it, this freak lizard doesn't just like vanilla but chocolate too! he attacked sis j who screamed and freaked out twice as loud and long as i did (city girl for ya) and once again it was hard to get back on topic. BUT the good part is that it definitley broke the ice with brother and I think were tight now. Nothin' like making a fool of yourself to get friends!

That's about all that i can muster folks....remember that this is only a slight little peek into my life and I wish I could just download everything that goes into my eyes and brain here on pdays and let you watch the movie. But for now, thats a wrap! till next week!

Love sister mcgrath

We asked her if this green and orange place was her house, here 

is her reply:  "haha yes thats my house, why? haha that's funny 

i don't even see that when i walk in. i guess it really is green huh?"

hahaha sis s doing crazy doctor moves on sis 

k's foot- haha you should have heard the screams!

its adult diapers for me...:/

Welp. It happened. I'm over the hill. Halfway to 40, and a fourth of the way dead. Who am I? I've been on this rock of earth for 2 decades? gee whiz I'm real old. But as they say wine gets sweeter with time(?) I don't know anything about that. Let's change it to beef jerky- beef jerky gets rougher/more flavorful with time. I guess I'm just ripening up over here, basking in my 20 years of life and ready to get even more flavorful. But lets take it back to before my bday--

There's a new store in Naga, its called super metro, and it is the ppino version of Target!!! the Target hole in my heart is filled!! its so fun to squeak around those floors on Mondays. Also I bought myself CHEESE there!!! for my bday!! ya!! I ate real cheese! First time in almost one year! It was so heavenly, I really know how to treat myself well!

This week we had unforseen splits with the trainees of two of the stls.  Sis J and I split and took them around our area. Its so cool to see how sis J is getting more comfortable and becoming a confident missionary. she's blossoming before my eyes! ah! the joy! its really the greatest experience training her and I'm going to cry a river when we split ways.

We had a community service project ripping out green foliage so one of the new members can build a new home. The ground is sooo rich here, its like dark oreo chocolate! there were only 2 knife hackers and so I just went at it with my bare hands. I got lots of cuts and stuff on my arms and legs and found looootsss of worms and centepedes. I LOVE IT! I love getting dirty sometimes. We washed in a creek next to people doing their laundry (but to the side of course so our flow wouldn't get them). Bishop says people from AZ must be really hard workers. Totoo, ang SIPAG ng mga taga az :) happy to represent!

On the night of the 9th we were getting ready for bed and I realized this was my last hour of being a teenager and I should do one last teenager act. so....I may or may not have crawled through this hole in the wall that connects two rooms together. It was a tight squeeze and a really dumb thing to do but I made it through! Sis K yells "its the portal from teen to adult!"- and so its official all- I'm a "real" adult. We laughed so hard and were pretty delirious....

It was the 10th and zone training day. I woke up without a birthday wish in my heart or a thought for myself at all and was just excited to get some spiritual refuel at zone training. It was so awesome! All the sisters in our zone are training and almost all the elders are too. More than 1/2 Naga mission is in the first or second transfer of training, so the theme was on battling home sickness and about our purpose. Whenever we talk about our purpose I get SO happy and full and almost emotional to be a part of this work. It was great!!

After the training we ate, then I put away the tables and chairs and hymnbooks as people were taking pictures..then noticed everyone was staring at me with sly grins....what the? They sang happy bday to me which is always awkward for the person being sung too...thanks? anyways we were about to go home and leave then Elder Kumaytotoya stands up and says that Naga district has to have an emergency meeting right now. I asked him why and he said pres has a problem with our district and we need to talk about it. NO! ok ok, I ran in and set up the chairs again and ushered everybody in (the mother inside me strikes again...darn it) our ZL said that president said something about our work, MINE and sis J's work that we have to fix. our DL was so serious and asked to see my planner. I was like "what! what! I've done nothing wrong! what am I not doing!" and was really so stressed out. they wouldn't tell me and said we had to wait for everyone to be there, but they were freaking me out so much. finally sis s and k come in and right about as i was gonna say "where WHERE you!?!?!" I saw a big red box in their hands........a cakebox.....................BAM it hit me! my despair to joy was that of Alma's as I realized that there was no problem, Pres isn't disappointed in me, and that it was all a ploy so we can eat cake and celebrate!!

they got me SO good!! I was really so freaked out and totally oblivious to the fact its my maligayang kaarawan. What the heck I've got the best district. they put party hats on all our heads and there was a toast by elder L our beloved DL and we all hacked at the cake so fast. It turns out every day when I've been language studying in the kitchen with sister k and tutoring her, sister s and j have been planning this!! Those scheming little girls!!!! It totally made my day and was the greatest bday ever.

Ahhh hold up, except also on that day when we visited the B family Tatay told us that its sure that Sis Jane cant come home from Manila for 3 months. I was crushed. It's probably most likely going to be I will be transferred when she gets home and it kills me to let her go! I actually got tears in my eyes and cried as I told Tatay that I was going to miss her and I would do almost anything to have her back again. I love sister jane so much! I care more about her concerns and worries and doubts and helping her work through them than myself! You dont know how many pages in my study journal are devoted to sister jane and filled with scriptures and thoughts to help her. we left and I felt like I wanted to cry. ahh. i could write a lot more but will move on for now...

That night we got a surprise invite from our very rich member in the ward to come out to eat for my bday. woo hoo! We ate with their family, he fed us baby back ribs and the plate was bigger than my face and the chunks of meat as big as my brain. I actually don't know, how big is my brain? (probably it has increased because I'm one year older and wiser too) it was roughly the size of a brain. And we ate it all!!

We waddled home after maraming maraming salamats and were greeted with WHAT? another round of bday celebration! Sis S and K bought choco ice cream!!! there truly always is room for ice cream. SO GOOD!!

Next day was exchanges, I worked in Canaman with sis San Jose. She's so nice! She and Prestosa are our stls. They are pretty cool, but I still didn't like being away from aki and our area for a day. I felt like I missed a whole day of new episodes and updates with our teaching pool. But their area was good to work in too, I learned a lot.  Sis San Jose is so fearless in her oym and is just in every way such a great missionary.

In one lesson there was this lady whose sister had just died one week ago. We sat on the floor with her and listened to her explain her feelings through tears, and a scripture came to me and we were able to comfort her and help her feel less burdened. That was not me- but the Spirit does truly work through is. It was just a great day of helping people and spreading sunshine and visiting with people in their homes and hearing their fears and doubts and being able to just be there for them. at the end of the exchange sis SJ told me I've got a real gift for teaching people not lessons, and that I can really listen to the Spirit and apply our message directly to them. I didn't know I was doing that well- it was really nice to hear that I'm actually doing ok out here :) She also said I've got a gift for connecting things and making analogies to help people understand and apply it to them. Anyways I learned a whole lot from SJ and not sure how much of it's true when she says she learned from me too. All I can say is when I take a step back and look at what I actually do all day, there's no other explanation but God working through me. I have no idea what I'm doing actually, but I do know that God takes weak things and uses them for a marvelous purpose. I'm living proof! It's so humbling to do this work.

On Sunday we came home from church and sis s had cooked this wonderful tilapia dish for my bday!!! its a never ending bday!!! unli-party!! we celebrated once again and studied our studies with party hats on. So great to have something to celebrate :)

UPDATE: ok, this is such a cool story!!!! Sis G told this to me before she went home! so I was with her in Goa right? do you recall all of my depressing emails about walking down the never ending path to Bahay? And all my pics of the rice fields down that way? So seriously that place is dry, there's not many people out there and its really really hard. one time we went exploring and walked deeper and deeper into the jungle, were about to turn back but then I saw a bike, so we kept walking. we found a house and there was an old man living there, I mean OLD like in his 70's. We taught him L1:1-2 and invited him to church. I almost half heartedly invited him because it is about an hour walk to civilization and no rides or trycees, and seeing the way he hobbled over to us I knew there would be a slight chance he would come. But he said he would come, and sure enough he came that first Sunday! I might have written that in my email months ago- the old man who came to church and we ran up the stairs to the chapel like kids on xmas. So then I got transferred that next week and ya, wala na. BUT!!!! BUT!!! GET THIS!!!! TAtay lorenzo is getting baptizzeeeeddddd!!! he has come to church diligently every week since we invited him and WALKS every time!!! he's soo old!! you never would guess!!! i wanted to cry when sis g told me!! all of those hard dreary walks that way paid off. sooo amazing.

Yikes wish i could write more but ive got to go!! i love you and thank you for all the bday emails and especially mama again for the package!!! you are the best!!!!!! thank you for the prayers, i need them. keep it coming! i love you and you are really the best family a girl can have! so glad we are together for eternity!

LOVE SIS MCGRATH

Average is the enemy of excellence

Welcome rainy season!! its been a downpour the past couple of days. Ok, necessary weather talk out of the way. moving on-

This week was transfer week, sis l left us and became an stl with my old kasama sis m in Daet!  There's one more angel in heaven, one more star in the sky!!  And so her replacement is sister K- an American whos sooo tall and is awesome! She went to byui and is just about to hit her 6 months in the mission! shes so cool! i love her! we have so much fun in our house all talking and laughing. It's weird being the oldest one though. when did this happen? sis s might be going to her real mission in Australia soon, NO!! i cant say goodbye again!! i know i say i love everyone and all of my kabahays but i really really love sis s!! Don't take her! I feel like shes my step-aki cause she came the same time as sis j and so i feel like I've partly raised her too.  Gosh I hate saying goodbye so much and wish I could just always tie the people I love to me with a really long string.

we oym-ed this lady the other day, then she said she had to go home so we started walking with her. we walked and got to know her and her background, she's had a rough life. we were walking a long ways with her down the streets of Naga and talking about the church and stuff, then I realized she was leading us right down the road with the mission home. sure enough, we went right in front of it, then she had to go, and so we got her number and all but then were left looking like lazy missionaries wanting to come inside and feel the air con. and as our luck would have it, right at that time all the departing missionaries came out and the pizza man pulled up and sis Reeder came out. we looked like total moochers because sis Reeder gave us a slice and all the departures I'm sure think we are not doing our work as they shook their heads at us. HEY! blessings of being in Naga and blessings of oym-ing! I plead the 5th! we were just doing our job :)

After that we walked to the B's house. Oh sister Jane. We were teaching her and listening to her concerns. she has a looooottt of concerns. As in, a lot of them. Its as if her doubts are chipping away at her faith. Its so sad, i don't know what else i can do to help her. the last last lesson she expressed her concern about where we go after we die and plan of salvation stuff, so i made her a teaching record full of scriptures from every point of Lesson 2 and a map of the Plan of Salvation. I gave it to her and sat with her and showed her the front, all the lessons an investigator must receive before baptism and I told her how this is it- this is the extent of things she needs to know before she gets baptized. She wants to fully research and read everything and know absolutely everything there is to know before she gets baptized, which is great, but it comes to a point where she knows enough. She comes to church every Sunday and always reads her scriptures. She just has a problem with taking the next step, she said that she's scared she can't see everything in front of her and might fall into a deep hole. We do our best to assure her there is no deep hole, there is nothing like that in front of her and to just take steps. Just have faith and take steps!

Ah man. I love this family so much, especially Sister Jane. I pray for her and our other people everyday and fast for them too. My study journal is full of "answer to question of sis jane" or "for jane" or who ever else as i read my scriptures and come across things that will help. i really really love these people. we were going to have our next lesson that week with our stake RS pres as a member present, but sis Jane's kids' visa just came in and so they are in manila fixing things. I thought it was going to be pretty quick, but on Sunday Tatay (bro b) said that its indefinite and might be up to 3 months that she's there. That's a bigggg kick in the gut. Her baptism was supposed to be this July.... Sis Reeder was going to work with us too....anyways, I will find a way to work it out. Just complications! Not to worry!

Bishop B worked with us this week too! wow talk about pressure/stress. we were hopefully going to go teach the SJ family- the ones who came to church once but then the Iglesia missionary snatched them- and sure enough when we went all the way to their house, only Sis Neda was there. Bro June was going to church at Iglesia with our favorite missionary. Blast it all! but we had a good lesson still with sis neda- we talked with her and bishop worked his magic :) we read 2 Nephi 31 and got out some of her feelings and concerns about baptism. HEY: if anyone is reading this who will serve in the ppines- do yourself a favor now and practice a non-offensive way how you can tell someone their baptism wasn't correct if there was no priesthood authority. You're going to become an expert on teaching apostasy/restoration especially in relation to the priesthood. Trying to tip toe around their feelings and also be bold and tell them the truth is quite a tight-rope walk.

Hm...this week i found myself being very super-mom.  It was a little freaky. I cooked everybody food then washed all their dishes and cleaned up, then my thought process was "great we can use this bucket of soapy water to mop real quick!" Killing 5 cockroaches like its nothing with my shoe, telling people to get showering, get things going, picking up after people constantly, even during our opening hymn of comp study I was singing and simultaneously texting people to see if they could come work at our appts later that day. AH! what has happened to me!! I'm such a mom!! there really is no course better than a mission for mommy prep 101.

Haha i have a funny story in my journal about "Lourdes the witch doctor" that you should ask me to read someday. One of our investigator's little girls told us what happens when they go to visit Lourdes. haha its so funny how some people go to their local witch doctor as their first line of medical care. also a little freaky...

4th of july!! it was also Sis Hoopes bday and so we got an invite to her lunch. it was awesome there were burgers and hot dogs and chips! woah! also chocolate cupcakes!! The Reeders were there and all the office elders. we are so lucky!  half way through eating i realized it was fast Sunday the next day and so stuffed myself even more for winter. 4 cupcakes no prob! So that's what we did for the 4th. oh ya also we sang America the beautiful for our comp study, but then i also made us sing bayang magiliw to represent my 2 countries :) SA DIBDIB MO'Y BUHAY!!

This week I read Jacob 5 in my personal study. Its so beautiful! and sad! as i read it was like everything was applying so perfectly to missionary work and it was so real to life. I started to cry when i read "what more could i have done for my vineyard?" and all of the faces of dropped investigators I've loved came to my mind. Not the ones that don't really care, but the ones who honestly have felt the Spirit, who I have prayed and worked hard and done all I could to help, but they would not.  Why will ye die?  Agency is the hardest thing.  Anyways i wrote a lot more about that in my journal but i will spare you the details. Point is- I feel a real urgency these days. a real urgency to do ALL I can, to do my best and to go the extra mile and do everything I can for my vineyard, or my little slice of planet earth here in Naga 3b. No slackin, no average, no no no we will have none of that. There's no excuse, I've got to be my best! Time is a ticking and I'm not going to waste a single drop.

That's about all I've got this week. thanks for the emails and pictures you sent! everything looks well and good in the life of the Mcgraths :) P.S. its my Bday this week and I very cleverly dropped that info on Sunday when the richest fellow in our ward was near, so I think things are going to be covered and I will be taken care of :) he he he I'm so sneaky.

JOY to the fishies in the deep blue sea! Joy to you and me!!!! Love you all and have a joyful wonderful week! save me some cake in the freezer! Hhaaaa not

Love sis mcgrath

2 transfers down in the heart of Bicol

Yup, we just finished week 6. Back to week one. time FLIES!!! What the heck!! I cant believe I've been training sis j for 6 weeks now. My long time kabahay and forever friend sis l is transferring- shes becoming an stl in daet with my old kasama sis m. So that's the changes- were getting a new roomie in the naga hotel. That's tomorrow- update ya next week on the new appt sitch.

I don't think I wrote last week about our pday adventures climbing Mt. Isarog. shame! Don't worry I will update you now. Our district hopped in the vans last monday morning super early and ventured out to this pinakamalaking mountain here in Naga. I was loaded with my camera and a can of peanut butter and a spoon and we went a hiking. it was SWEET!! pretty far and pretty intense hike- lots of scaling mountain through the jungle stuff. Sis j isn't really the "hiking type" if you know what i mean, so i got to stop and smell the roses (pick leeches off my neck and look at weird leaves) as we slowly made our way up. it was so beautiful, like i wish you all could go there. there were falls at the top and the temptation to cannon ball in the icy water was almost unbearable! Hey look at my pic we found this long juicy centipede thing! Hakuna matata! nature is so cool. anyways it took us a lot of hours, when we were at the top and elder brought all his letters and pics from his girlfriend who's engaged and we burned them. What else is there to do when you get dear Johned? This whole week my legs were sooooo sos o so so so sore. sooo hard to walk this week- that hike was hard core parcore.

We had a FHE with the G family that Monday- refer to picture. guess how many RMs are in that picture?? can you say pressure? they are super nice but it is very pressure-full whenever we go there or teach their niece in their home. I hope I'm doing everything right........ but its ok they like us and think were pretty cool. The fhe consisted of us questioning and brother Gamil, answering questions from one of the 3 categories he gave us- 1. education and pre-married life, 2. dating and courting, 3. married life. haha dead serious. we heard lots of wisdom :)

We oym-ed a man this week who told us he was the representative for Africa, that he had cameras installed in his eyes, and asked us if we see God. shuffle shuffle "okkk weve gotta go now...." I sure meet a wide range of characters out here.

Sis s (the trainee of sis l and my kabahay) went to manila last week to pee for her medical test for her visa. She's really serving in Australia and will leave as soon as her papers are ok. NO! I'm going to miss her!! Man i really am not a fan of making so many great friends and then having to say GOODBYE. ugh. i hate goodbye. sis g and m and d and so many others are leaving tomorrow :'''''''''''((((((( I hate how its not a sure thing that I will ever see them again :( But the bright side of Sis S going to manila is that we ordered krispe kreme donuts and she brought us home a box. we inhaled it way too fast and were left licking the frosting from the box. Ohh donuts are glorious.

Our apartment really did get turned into the Naga hotel this week- elder l and s came and set up 2 bunk beds in the spare room and so now we are fully equipped to hold 8 sisters here. bring it on. we actually made a sign complete with paper flowers welcoming sisters when they walk in to the Naga hotel. I wanted to write (food/toilet paper/bed sheets not included but realized that's a little unchristlike...)

Also this week we had a great day of teaching the Book of Mormon and it was just awesome- and so as we were heading home after work I thought why not drop by the Reeders why don't we? and so we texted them and got to go chat with pres and sis reeder in their kitchen and tell stories of our work. we ate bananas and got to chat- I felt like i was hanging out at a friends house talking with their parents. President and sister Reeder are the best! they are so down to earth and i love them so so much. wish we could just chat all the time :) Sis Reeder might work with us next week if she can make it! perks of being Naga sisters!

As far as the work- people are slowly progressing, slowly going through the process, slowly learning and opening the pages of the Book of Mormon. Some setbacks too- one of our awesome couples who came to church last week didn't come again, after our lesson with them Saturday we were interrupted by a visit from their iglesia missionary who may or may not have unraveled all of our hard work. argh. Also sis Jane is sort of frustrated and wanting to know every single thing about Mormon doctrine before she agrees to get baptized. Like she wants to read all the terms and conditions before she signs on the dotted line, which is totally ok I get her, but she wants to finish reading the whole Book of Mormon/D&C/Pearl of Great Price first. Also plan of salvation where we go after we die is sort of a weak spot for her. I could update a whole whole lot more but, you know. pday time limitations. anyways, the work is slowly but surely pressing on.

Hey, have I told you how wonderful it is to be a missionary and how much i love it? if you've missed the point in my past emails, here it is again- this mission is the best thing I've ever done. There's nothing else I'd rather sacrifice sleep or comforts for, I really love it! Pres Reeder told me that night we were over with them that America says A-ok to same sex marriage. I think I will just be fine staying here in this country, dealing 100% with other peoples problems than my own or my country's. Oh America. needless to say I'm enjoying and making the most of every sip of Buko, every trycee that says "in God we trust" or something of the sort, and every crooked toothless smile on brown dirty kids. its a goood life here :)

I love you all and thank you for the pictures and emails from the fam reunion! looks fun fun! miss you! Thank you for the prayers and for being the bestest family/support system a girl could ask for. i really am so lucky!

LOVE sis mcgrath 

SWEET is the work! again! did i say that before? its still sweet! ok!

ppina/american po ako

Ahhhhhh where do I even start!!! this week has been so full of wonderful things and progress and miracles and I feel happier than if I just ate a whole pack of Oreos straight! YA! THAT happy!!! lets break it down folks:


This week was awesome because we had the best family home evening.  I don't know if I've told you about the B family but if I've never written its a shame-- cause they are one of the best most favoritest people of my whole mission. its too long to tell you their whole story.  To keep it short--there's Sis Jane (the wife) and Tatay and her 20 something old son (recent convert). and Sister Jane has been our focus for soooo long and she always comes to church but says its not the time yet to be baptized, shes waiting for an answer to her prayers and a sign. there is so much more to the story I wish I could write. anyways, that's where we were last Monday. we invited them to fhe which was awesome by the way- the son of the members played us the VIOLIN!!! I haven't heard that since 11 months!! it was so beautiful even though it was just a little hymn. ah man I miss music like that.  Ok coming back to the them later.

Us at FHE with the B family at the E home

Next- we had a mission tour!! Elder and Sister Pajaro came!! They are the coolest people ever!!! And guess what their daughter is serving in Mesa Arizona mission!!! So if you EVER see a Sister Pajaro please, pull over and give her a hug and buy her some ice cream and show her my picture of me with her parents and tell her how awesome they are and how awesome her country is. She comes home January just like me so we will never prob cross paths...sayang. But ya, the Pajaros are such powerful speakers and such genuine people!! It was so good to hear from them and I wish we could just do it all over again.

us and the pajaros

The night before we had a grand total of 8 SISTERS in our apt- so crazy. so stressful when everyone is trying to shower and get as pretty as they can and find their take out order of mac-do, all the while I'm trying to clean up after their every move and GOOD THING because right after mish tour the Pajaros and President and Sister Reeder came to our house and checked our apartment. GULP.  I hope we didn't embarrass them too bad. The Pajaros are pretty down to earth and so I don't think they were too judgmental of our bahay :)



Naga zone at mission tour

And so lots of other things happened this week but I'm just going to return to the story about Sis Jane cause its the best.  Ok, so we went to visit them one evening and her face was very frowny and she opened up and told us all her concerns, like why is it that everyone on testimony meeting can stand up and say " I know this church is true" but she can't, or hasn't felt that surety yet, and her other problem is about what will happen to all the other people who don't become Mormons, what's going to happen, etc etc plan of salvation stuff.  The next couple of days after that lesson I could not get her our of my mind- I studied and studied and flipped those pages, prayed, flipped some more, pondered, etc. I got many pages of notes. Its like, I wasn't just reading my scriptures but I NEEDED them.  As I was thinking about her and reading scrips to help I got this picture in my mind of her being sealed to her family in the temple, saw a slight view of her potential and what all can be hers. I blinked. This is not just a lesson, not just answering a concern, this is salvation! this is a real soul of our Heavenly Father! She is a real person and she needs what we have.  I flipped again all with this vision in my head.

Wuv my friends

So here comes the lesson- I had prayed and thought a lot about what to share and got the feeling that we needed to watch the Mormon message by Elder Bednar about discerning light.  We had a member present Sis G- a convert also to the church, her age, who was ready to share her experiences. Before the lesson they were all chatting chatting about nursing and school in stuff in Bicol and me and Sis J were not really picking up anything they were saying. But as soon as we said the opening prayer, I understood everything. Everything that came out of Sis G's mouth, her testimony and comments in pure Bicol, I understood. WHAT THE!!! the gift of Tongues is SOOO REALL!!! it really is exclusively for the Lord's purposes. Its not for chatting about whatever, but when its time to work out some salvation, it comes. I said such a prayer of gratitude for that.

ok so we are in the lesson- watch the video, talk about it. She expresses her feelings, we talk some, listen, listen. we share some scriptures, listen some more. At one point I found myself testifying about how much she needs baptism, how many signs are before her already and how much that God loves her and wants her to return back home. I don't really remember all that I said or how I said it, but I do remember how powerful I felt and how much that the Spirit was doing the talking, I was just opening my mouth. After I stopped talking there was silence, everyone just stared. Even Sis J just didn't know what to do but stared. I felt in that moment the Spirit confirm all of my words to her.  Later as I reflected on the lesson when we came home I read that line in my fathers blessing before I came here, "as you look at the people as your brothers and sisters and speak with the Spirit, they will recognize that you speak the truth and that you are there to bring them home." I know they all knew that we were speaking the truth and could not deny it. After that we extended a baptismal date, things were said, and she ACCEPTED!!!!!!!!!! AHHH!!!!! we could NOT contain our joy!!!!

We also offered to fast with her, so Saturday night we came over again and knelt in prayer. She asked to know the way she needs to go. We fasted until Sunday- I felt the Spirit so strong all day. Later Sister G our member present said that we have something different, she said she has worked with a lot of other missionaries (is an RM herself and has lots of RM kids) and said that when she went with us to Sister Jane she felt something different. she said Sister J and I have a different spirit. AAAAND to put icing on the cake of this week- we went out to greet people coming to church and TWO INVESTIGATORS came we weren't really expecting!!! And they loved church! The brother and his wife came- brother J told us that he is really searching for the truth and he really wants to know what is right. That is another miracle story of how we found him and how I got the prompting and stopped in my tracks to knock on his door.  But anyways, isn't this the beeeessstttt work ever!? so many miracles!!


It is the greatest feeling to be used as an instrument in God's hands.  There's no other way or other thing that makes you feel this sort of happy.  I am amazed at the love that He has for everyone of his children, and the plan He has for them. It is so incredible to see how things work out, how He gathers his children one by one.  I promise He truly knows us!!  He really, honestly does. this is his WORK and his GLORY to bring to pass the immorality and eternal life of man. God- the creator of everything and one who has all wisdom told us that He does nothing else with all his time and power, than to work out salvation for us.  Nothing else.  ALL of his work and time is for us. he has no other purpose than our eternal happiness.  All he is pleading is for us to choose Him, to chose His way. He sent his son Jesus Christ who taught us how to return to Him.  All we have to do is follow Him and we will be happy.  ITS THAT SIMPLE!  Ah I can write a million more words but the time is far spent and there is little remaining.  Ah. It is just such a good thing to be a missionary and by far the best thing I've ever done.  I love this.

misshies

I've realized that how ever much I think I can and want to save the whole world, I can't. Christ is the Savior of the world, not me. I cannot steal his role or take his place, I cant fix all the problems. I've realized how humbling it is to step down and instead of being the hero, just trying to introduce people to the hero. I'm just His representative, I'm a weak girl who doesn't really know much, cant solve world hunger, cant even provide for the roofs that people ask us for as we walk by their shack homes. There are soooo many problems wayyy out of my hands and reach. BUT I do know that the Savior knows, he is not called the Savior for nothing. As His servant I love him and try my hardest to be his hands here on earth. 


I love you all! Happy Father's day dad!!  Hope you all give dad extra hugs for me :) Have a good time at the reunion! Eat lots of Mexican food for me :) Ah man ok actually I'm super mad I'm missing out on that- please lets do it all again soon. Ok that is all I have to say.  Goodbye!


LOVE Sis Mcg

HIKING MT ISAROG!!! Man this hike was the most intense
thing ever. Imagine hard core indiana jones jungle style.
the falls were soooooo beautiful though! Worth it.

Another great week!

sunday trycee selfie with my aki 

motha/daughta foreva!!

Another great week! We kicked off the great week with the arrival of my package!!!! :O:O:O!!!!! so excited!!! i opened it and was greeted by wonderful beautiful fresh clothes with no holes and the mac and cheese and plan of salvation charts and all of the american goodness na ipinadala mo sa akin. it was SO great mom- THANK YOU to the one millionth degree. It made my life!

in zee tryceee GO NAGA!!

this week we had exchanges- sis j's first and our first time being split! AH! i did NOT like that. She went to work in the stl's area and i lead our area here with sis d. Sis d is so sweet, as in SO sweet. Its like i was walking and working with a baby lamb all day :) she's so kind and encouraging to me and all day kept sticky notes of wonderful things i did or said and then recited them to me at the end of the day. See what i mean? she is sooooo kinddddd. anyways she really made me feel good about myself and feel that hey i'm actually doing a pretty great job with this area and training and everything. awh i love sis d. I juiced all the advice out of her i could- she goes home at the end of this transfer. i love getting advice and hearing about all the lessons and things missionaries have learned. it was a good day, but at the end i missed my aki! in the morning we went to their area to pick her up (i tried to just go in basketball shorts cause i was so eager but she made me change. humpf..) i ran in and

us and Mama Reeder

 my aki- you'd think it had been years we hadn't seen each other. i love sis j!!!!!

The next day was the new trainees/trainers workshop.  We got to eat in the mish home! Sis Reeder ordered kfc (rice and a fried chicken) and I got to sit by president :D hee hee.

Haha ok two funny stories about things people said this week. numba one. we oymed this guy and introduced ourselves and church name and said we were more known as mormons. he said "oh ya...there are tons of minions here". whhhhatt he honestly thought we were called "minions". me and sis j stared and tried not to burst out in laughter in front of this guy...then reintroduced "MORMONS po" haha HA haha. minions. Ok story numba two: this one sweet 15 year old girl we've been teaching has been terribly mistaken also about the name of our church- multiple times in the lesson she dropped the name "aklat ni mormons" in the place of just "mormons" or something.  HA i don't want to laugh at these sweet innocent mistakes but its seriously so funny.

On Sunday the area presidency spoke through broadcast to us. it was awesome! this little girl on Sunday came up to me and made me come close to her and with the most sincere eyes asked me if I live where Elsa lives. I told her yes and she said she wanted to go there. I told her she needs a jacket first, she said she had one, then I told her to hop in my bag lets go and she really looked at my bag, then at herself, then tried to fit in. HA! ohhh so cute!! so funny. another kid that day told his mom he wanted a picture with the barbie. oh my gosh. So i had to pose with him as they took pics. peeeeeooooppppleee i'm just white ok!? all of this just reconfirms my conviction that the idea of becoming a Disney princess is the WORST occupation in this UNIVERSE. never. ever.

We came home from church and the two sisters that slept in the naga hotel (our apartment) were packing up their stuff to go back to their area, but were lingering like they wanted lunch. ehhhh. I told them we were just going to eat sardines, they lingered until they saw we were serious then left.  But MAN! have you ever tried spanish sardines mixed in spaghetti? oh my gosh its so good!! It's like 19.99 at olive garden good! I'm in love with it. Thats actually too bad they went home, it was delish.

mtc kasama reunion :) sis falcon is training too 

Thats the week this week- next week we have mission tour and a visiting authority is coming to speak to all of us mishies! yay! then he's probably coming to check our apartment cause we're the closest ones here. great. needless to say things are going to get whipped into shape and bleached and scrubbed the next couple of days. anywyaayaayysss..s..s.s.s......

I LOVE YOU family you are the best. the best of the best. i am so grateful to be your daughter <3 Love SIS MCG

trainers/trainees

Amazing

LOVE. my aki! 

It's been another week but feels like years since I've written. Something about training really makes me learn a million things in a short time, and so I feel like a more wise and better soul than I was last Monday. Crazy, right?

This week has been good. As in really, really good. Nothing specific that makes it so good but I feel so wonderful! I feel whole inside, I wish I could describe it better. Something about serving and giving and pondering the scriptures and going about applying it cleanses you, man. This week I've felt extra cleansed inside. I just feel so much I'm becoming such a better person than the one I was when I started this whole thing- I can't believe the change especially when I thought i didn't need that much changing in the first place.  How wrooong I was :) So much progress and work and learning and I feel so great to have the chance to rebuild myself.  Missions are awesome.

So last monday Sis M and her kasama slept over because there was mlc the next day, so it was great to see her again! party party with my old kasama! I even bought her a chocolate cake and candles and sat her down in her favorite swivel chair and we celebrated her bday that we missed. awww love her :)

This week I've been waking up so excited. so excited just to go OUT and do WORK! like, i wake up and i say "YESS!!" and am so eager to read my scriptures and study and then go work. i don't even stress or worry about getting punted or if all our plans fall through, i am just so happy to go out and talk to everyone! And with our investigators its so fun to see the progress, to go out and add another chapter to their story, help them, all of it. ya, i dont know, I'm just loving every day so much!

last p day

This week i cooked- I made this deLISH tilapia thing cooked in coconut milk and it was beautiful and I got a round of applause from my ppinas :) I'm so ppina now its awesome!! then in studies we read the line in the white handbook about missionaries must return home to their country at the end of their missions without delay, and the taste of that coconut was still fresh and it brought tears to my eyes. It's still far away i know, but man. I am going to miss. this. place. I wiped away the tear and continued on enjoying the day i have and living in the moment and eating all the buko :)

Our comp studies with me and aki j are SO good! Like, i know its 2 hours and all but we always are like "what the times up?" at the end from talking about the gospel and reading scriptures and preach my gospel and everything. She is so smart and i love the way her mind works, she opens my mind to lots of things i haven't thought of before :) I love our studies and LOVE sister j. She is such a blessing and i am honored to get to be her first companion :) 

me and my aki!

I called a rooftop dinner together due to some bonding that needed to happen in our house- and so we ate "nachos" on the rooftop together as kabahay :) it was fun! did i mention we have a roof top? anyways, mission accomplished, full bellies and happy faces for all :)

Story time- this week we went looking for this oym guy and got super lost, were wandering in all of these skinny roads trying to find his little hut but it was so confusing- finally we found him but he told us he was busy and shut the door. Blast it all, dude we just spent like an hour trying to find you! So we walked back rejected and it was a blazin' heat and the word was looking dreary.

BUT alas! here's where the tender mercy comes in! We were walking by this house and the door was open and all of a sudden I walked like a magnet to it. we talked to the lady inside, she just got back from picking up her girl from school and looked hot and tired and busy. i was about to say "ok we will just come back another day" and opened my mouth to say that but what came out was "do you have 10 minutes right now?" what the? I totally was not going to say that but, there it was. She sort of hesitated and let us in. we started teaching her and she was not really paying attention, then her daughter came in. We started talking to her too and asking her questions, she was super awesome and telling us about her life and God and stuff. Sister J was talking and said that Jesus was our brother and for some reason when she said that it was like lightning in my brain- all of the sudden a perfect plan of where to take the conversation and how was in my head. I started saying the things, it lead perfectly to extending a baptismal date, and BAM she accepted!! as in! we met her like 20 mins ago and she agreed to be baptized! We left the lesson on cloud 9, were hugging and so happy :) All i can say is that right there was the Spirit. There's no other explanation! My companionship with sister J, her words for sparking the Spirit, and then the companionship of the Spirit to lay out in my mind what to do is so amazing to be a part of. I think I've felt the Spirit more strongly and clearly these past few weeks in training, its such a tender mercy of the Lord. I love sister j and I love the Lord and I love the work and i love the area and i just am so full of loooovveeee! 

this is what all my days look like

This week I taught my first Islamic lady on my whole mission. Ya, it was very interesting. this whole time I've been trained to work with Catholic background, so it was weird to have to go back back and explain Jesus Christ. It was pretty hurtful the things she was saying about Him, and I know thats her beliefs and all but it was shocking to hear. It was a different feeling for sure in the lesson as we bore testimony of the divinity of Jesus Christ to someone who doesn't believe in him.  I know He is the Savior of the world and that He lives. How interesting that that belief can be so far off from what she was saying.

This week in zone training it was about the Atonement. We had a great discussion, then split into groups and had to share about what the Atonement means to us. The Spirit was so strong and I learned a lot. I had a powerful experience where I was corrected from my former thoughts of a missionary and filled with the love that Jesus Christ has for that person. I have no right to judge, I am just as much of a sinner as the person next to me, and we all need the atonement. I cried, was corrected, and felt the overwhelming gravity of the sacrifice Jesus made for each and every one. It was a good day and i needed it.

This week we also got to teach an Iglesia missionary. That was interesing too, one of our OYMs that we went to follow back on was in the moment being taught by this iglesia missionary. Not wanting to intrude or anything rude we offered to come back another day, but they both invited us in and asked us to share. They were respectful to us which im grateful for :) We sat across from them and boldly declared our beliefs and bore testimony to them. Even though we are just kids, I felt like more than myself as we taught with the Spirit. It doesn't matter who you are, how old or educated or poor or helpless, we proclaim the truth and do not apologize. We have an appointment to go back next week, hopefully it continues well!

us at a homecoming of the gamil's missionary daughter in our ward

I've felt the Spirit this week so much, I have such a testimony that God will fill our mouths with things to say if we put ourself in a place to be used and then open them. So many times things come out of my mouth that I didn't think of to say before, or ideas come to my head as we listen and speak. God is speaking to his children through us, through me. He can't go about speaking to all of us face to face, but He can send missionaries who will do exactly that for Him. I know God is real, He is aware of us, and that He is in this work. There's no denying it! I am so honored to be the Lord's instrument and truly cherish this mission.

I love you all so so much and am so grateful for your prayers! continue! I feel the strength and love you send my way and also pray for you every day. I am so grateful for you mom and dad, and for being the people you are. I love you so much!

LOVE SIS MCGRATH

naga ZONE rocks